I have a young son who is starting to get his teeth, but they haven't broken through yet. My mother in law, for some reason, feels the need to stick her fingers in his mouth to feel his how much he has progressed. She has also put her fingers in his diaper to "feel if he's wet" after i told her I just changed him! It irritates me so much I feel like dis-owning her but I feel like I shouldn't say anything because she had a motorcycle accident, and she is now going through surgery for breast cancer. I am his mother, if anyone needs to be sticking their fingers in his mouth, it's ME! She just seems to disregard anything I say, but I don't want to hurt her feelings. When my son was still inside me, she came with me to the doctor's office for the anatomy ultrasound. She made a comment about my son's penis comparing it to my nephew's saying my nephew's was bigger. Needs no comment. I've talked to my husband and he says "I don't know what to tell you". Any suggestions?? she's drivin me nutz
Really. Every time a government official talks on the grass because it is illegal, they attack it from a moral standpoint, it makes no sense to me as the snuff is the leading cause of preventable death (~ 500,000 / year) in the country and Alcohol is the second leading cause of preventable death in the country ... snuff is the # 2 cause of death overall in the U.S. , Behind heart disease, and alcohol is the # 6 just below unintentional injuries (not including alcohol-related deaths, but including accidental poisoning, falls, no intoxicant-related crashes and accidental overdose) and Alzheimer just above and diabetes ... I still have not seen any political complain either of those two drugs are legal, but God forbid - someone mentions weeds *** (15 ~ deaths per year) *** and moral arguments against Weeds are endless. A couple of questions: Do you consider it morally wrong to punish a drug that causes 15 deaths per year, while sitting around doing nothing (not even attempting to punish) a drug that causes ~ 500,000 deaths / year and a drug that causes ~ 75,000 deaths / year (take your pick, both the cause and the cause of more than 5,000 times more deaths than weed)? Do you feel bad that government officials making up stories about why a drug should be illegal? Do you think the bad government has robbed individuals of the freedom to decide what can and can not do for them is their own body? The real problem I have with the way the government is punishing weeds that are lying about why it is illegal. The reason it is illegal is because the government (think) you can not make money by selling it. If you just say that would make me feel much better, but instead indoctrinate children (gullible little things) of the U.S. to think it is a dangerous drug, when it is not. My biggest question: Why does not the government just tell the truth? Come and say:
I honestly don't know what to do. My boyfriend and I have been together for 7 years and plan to get married this summer and we have two children together. And since the beginning of our relationship I have had problems with her with I could deal with before but know that we have kids I just can't take it anymore. What really pushed me over the edge was last year when we where living in their unfinished basement of their 6000 sq ft house (since we weren't allowed to take a bedroom since they didn't want us to wreck the floor) while trying to get a house of our own, our two pomeranians were not allowed in their house because they were not fixed and my in laws said the dogs would ruin the house, even though we gave them one of the puppies that our dogs had and that one was in the house and defecated and urinated all over the house and would bark non stop, well one day while i was at work and my dogs where out in their cages in the garage in middle of the summer somehow my bright red dog got out of his cage and my mother in law must not have seen he was out and went to leave in her car ( to see her husband since he works in the neighborhood) and somehow my dog was in the road and she hit him and he died. I got the phone call at work and came straight home only to be told by my father in law that i HAD to tell my mother in law (who was hiding in between the back seats of her car) that it was okay that she ran over my dog and that i was not mad at her. And still to this day we can not talk about my dog because "it upsets her too much" and if we do say something to her about it she runs to her husband and tell him we said something so he calls my boyfriend and yells at him for bringing it up. And the biggest problem that I have with her is with my children. I do not speak to my mother because she is an alcoholic, so I wanted my children to at least have one grandma so I tried to get over all the issues but I can't. When she had her two kids they NEVER were put into car seat she just held them until they were too big, then they just roamed the car, and she has tried to let that happen with my son, I have told her no on multiple occasions and one time my son had an accident in the car and i left his extra clothes at her house so i took off his pants and underwear and wrapped his bottom with my sweatshirt and strapped him in the car seat since we were 5 minutes from her house. My son was upset because of the accident and not having extra clothes so he was kinda throwing a fit about getting it the seat and my mother in law says oh well leave him in the back with her other son and she will drive home as fast as she can, but i strapped him in anyway, and went to walk around the car to get in the front seat and when i got in her ten year old was trying to unstrap his car seat and my MIL knew it and didn't say anything so i had to tell him to leave my son alone, he is fine. And another occasion while my son and i were with her he was upset about being in the seat so long so she stopped the car and asked me to let him sit in the back seat, without a car seat, and i told her no. but I think that she lets him when I am not around because after he comes home from her house he refuses to sit in his car seat and she does not put a winter jacket on my son, she thinks putting a blanket on him is sufficient enough, or she will take off his jacket when we get into the car, even though he is fine with it on. Another thing is that she lets my son sleep in bed with her when he sleeps over, which he sleeps in his own bed at our house. (Her eleven year old son is still sleeping in their bed and she still wipes his butt after he has a bowel movement). And the worst of it all is that she obsesses over my son's pee pee. She will always offer to take him to the bathroom or give him a bath in with after wards she is always examining his pee pee and touching it. Even her own husbands agrees. I have not confronted her about it, i just try and take my son to the bathroom or not let him take a bath while we are there, because i know if i do she will just run to her husband who will just call and yell at my boyfriend which is the last thing he needs (working 53 hours a week at full time job, also being a paid on call firefighter for our town, and taking classes to further his career as a firefighter) And I don't appreciate her making all her little comments towards me trying to make me feel like i am not a good mom. She is somewhat a hoarder and has just about every toy from both of her two sons. She lets my son play with the toys and sometimes take them home, but says she wants it back, she comes to our house she goes to his room and goes through all his toys taking what are hers and sometimes even taking toys that aren't to bring back to her house, and i have told her to stop letting him bring home toys but she does it anyway. I don't know what to do to stop her but still let my kids have a re
Let me explain, my mother is never there for me, not when I graduated from college, not when I was in the hospital from a car accident. She claims she hates to drive. So now I have cut her off from me, but my other relatives say I'm wrong. I don't hate her, but I want her to see how it feels to have nobody when you're in need.
About 2 days I called my sister and she said her brother 15 years old , suffered a motorcycle accident and needs surgery . Well his family lives in the Philippines and she has been sending money to help his father is dead and her mother has had two heartattacks in the last year . She told me she was working all days and times of my brother been cut and will rest more days of working . She asked him to get a second job to help pay for the surgery and he refused. Now I was telling this to my mom and she went on a rant about how he should not have to pay for your family .... WTF ? I never said I had to pay for his family , but at least it should be decent enough to help ... I do not understand at all. She defends him no matter what he does , even when he hit her in the coke ... But really how can you defend someone who is so cruel as to let the brother of his wife sitting in a hospital with his leg bone stcking ?
I'm 25, and my mom is super uninterested in my two kids. She's never babysat for me, when she sees them, she says hi to them, but doesn't hug or kiss them. Even in desperate situations, like when my husband got into a car accident, and broke his hip, totalled our car, and I was 8 1/2 mo pregnant and I had to go to the ER for my husband, she still wouldn't watch my son, bc she "had to work"..... she owns her own business, it's something she totally could've postponed! She has never been there for me (well she used to when I was younger). She gets drunk several times a week, and puts me at the end of her list. Her business, and drinking is more important to her than everything else. So, how do I get to a point where I just grow up and stop "needing" her? I have a wonderful mother-in-law, who goes out of her way just to see her grandkids, who lights up when she sees them, and whose always there when we are in need. I have a great relationship with her, so why isn't that enough for me?
My mom husbands can not get along with me for some reason. She has lied constantly doing that often separate us , but we got back together and every time she hates him . When I was 8 months pregnate with this child and I had our 1 yr old son who had gotten into a car accident and taken to the hospital so that when we went to look was furious with me when I picked him up to take him caused a great arguement in the van with my husband and stepmother . She can scream and get in my face and almost made me go to work . When I try to be nice to my husband she returns and tells more lies saying I shouted . Whenever she has our child something goes wrong . She always gets into fights in front of him and has no respect for me . Is it a bad thing that prevents him from being with my son and the baby alone ? With this new baby is bad for me I do not want in the hospital when she is causing chaos ? What is the best way to handle someone like her ?
My husband, Jay and I are late 30’s and have known each other since we were 16 years old. Neither of us are angels as we have both “sown our wild oats”. We dated as high school students and broke up due to regular juvenile issues of my father being so strict and my not being able to go out like he was able to do. My husband had no parental guidance and had a mother who would slip him valium at the age of 8 so he would go to sleep and she could stay up and party. We both lost a parent at the age of 14. His being his father who was a biker and died in a motorcycle accident, mine was my mother who died after a 5 year battle with cancer. We had a lot in common in that we had both suffered a loss so early in life and were both angry at the world, but at the same time we grew up totally different. My father is a respected school teacher and never did drugs a day in his life. His mother was a “hippie” who believed in free love to the extent she gained quite a reputation and did not have any morals to keep her from having sex with her son’s friends when she was the same age I am now and the boys were only 14-16 years old (pedophile?) and she is still an addict and a shoplifter. Where I am going with this is… Through our lives, we “grew up together”. After we broke up at 16, I started to date a mutual friend of ours at age 17. Through the years Jay and I remained friends as did he and Will, who is now my ex husband-Will. Will and I were together from that time on and I got pregnant at age 23. We got married because we thought that was the right thing to do. I had our beautiful son at age 24 but by the time I was 27, we were divorced. He cheated on me repeatedly and became very mentally and physically abusive. I had enough finally and kicked him out. I found out after our divorce was final that one of the women he had slept with was Jay’s wife. I told Jay. He and I had an affair during that time, but I was not looking to jump back into anything serious and he was still married to her and wanted to make it work. I went on with my life as did he. In 2000, I had just broken up with my now ex-fiance, and was ready to move on with my life. Will, my ex came by to pick up our son (by this time we had worked through our issues and are now able to be civil as this is what is the right thing to do with our son and we get along better now than we ever did… we have grown up). He informed me that Jay and his wife were divorcing and he knew I had always cared for him and he was really depressed and could use some cheering up.. basically giving his blessing. Weird huh? I called Jay and told him I would like to meet up one night and get a drink or something. We did and he asked me to move in 8 months later. We lived together for 4.5 years before we married. During the first few years, we would go out and kick up our heels on the weekends that we did not have our children. In 2002, an old “acquaintance”, “Helen” of his came forward and took him to court to prove he was the father of her child. He was found to be the paternal father…(I must mention that she is part of the reason his first marriage broke up). The child was from a one night fling in 1993. She was sleeping with multiple men at that time and thought someone else may be the father and did not want Jay in the child’s life no matter what. She came back into his life in 1998-99 and was causing problems between he and his wife. She acted like her friend and then stabbed her in the back by trying to break up their marriage. After their divorce, the two befriended each other and came up with a scheme to break Jay and I up by using the child. Which is how the paternity test came into play. At that time, he told her that he would do whatever needed to be done and if the boy wanted to have him in his life he would do what he could for him, but that she was not a part of his life and would not be any longer. She told him at that time that the child did not know him and she did not want anything from him nor did she want him involved in the child’s life. You see, Jay is an alcoholic and was addicted to pills (lortab, xanax, etc.). Yes, I know this is a lot, but I haven’t gotten to the point yet, I just want to lay the ground work so you will understand. Helen (I’ll call her). That was in 2002. Now, 6 years later, she has contacted Jay’s mother, and wants Jay to be in her son’s life. He wants to be in his life, as we have recently started going to church and have been trying to get our lives on the right track after all the alcohol and addiction problems, I have stayed by his side. I love my husband and have been through hell and back. His mother is part of the problem as she is still on pills and this is where he was getting his “supply”. She is in no way supportive toward us as I do not approve of who and how she is. She is not a good influence in Jay’s life and she has done nothing to help him. Only hurt him. But she is his mother and he does still love her. So, I have kept my mou
My brother recently got married and had a son . They were only dating a little less than a year before they became pregnant . Of course , my mom , being that this was her first grandchild , was super excited . She has done everything for them , we've all tried to help as much as we can know hthe baby and her new apartment . Before my brother met her , my mother had all our cars to its name in the insurance. Even with my brothers bad accident history , she still helped him out and sure under your name . He is now married and his wife does not have a valid New York State . My mother has been asked many times if you have a license , and told my mother did . Finally my mom asked my brother to show him the license and my brother called my mother back and basically said he had none . My mom freaked out , if she had gotten into an accident with a license could have lost my mother evertyhting property , which is not much to begin with.
My mother-in-law moved in with us because of drug abuse and depression (example: several major car accidents, evictions, job firings). She does nothing to help out around the house and lays in bed all day. She takes more than her allowed dose of Prozac. When she does talk, all she talks about is her horrible past and all the shoulda woulda couldas. This could be while we're watching a movie, or trying to have dinner, or even when I'm on the phone with someone else. Everywhere she goes she thinks people think bad things about her. She will go on and on for hours about the same thing. She has no manners around the house, nevers cleans up after herself, walks around in underwear, doesn't close the bathroom door, eats up the fridge. When she finally gets a job, she calls in all the time and then blows her money on hair and nails and eating out. I can't stand it anymore! I feel used and I want my privacy back. I'm tired of focusing on her and and trying to makes things easy for her. How can I do that, though? How can I listen to someone for hour upon hour non-stop about all the bad things that happened to her and that's the ONLY thing she ever talks about? What gives her the right to lay in bed all day and not function like a normal person? She's full of excuses and I'm tired of it and am on the verge of throwing her out. We've been honest about our feelings to her but she has not made any effort to change or try to show a more positive outlook at least in front of her son and I HATE the sadness I see in his eyes because of her. It's making me hate HER for hurting him and not even trying. It's causing problems with my husband because he feels like I do but it's his mom too, but I'm tired of her little jabs at me like his high school love that she had hoped her son would marry and how much tidier her place was than how I keep mine. How WE made her move in with US (she was EVICTED). How do I deal with her comments when she follows me around the house? She has no money saved to live anywhere else and no one wants to take her in. Please help before I really break a family bond for life....
Hello, Unfortunately my mother is probably going to get fired today. She has been working in a nonprofit organizatin during the last 43 years and that's all he knows. I fear for my mother because she is disabled and is 62 years old. She will retire as soon as I finish college, I'm a freshman studying biology at SFSU. Unfortunately, my father recently so my mom supports our family. If my mom is fired most likely lose our house and who knows what else would happen. I am happy that I have my loved ones, but I digress back to the facts. My mother is the longest of employee working there the entire organization, which includes all offices in the Bay Area (San Francisco, Oakland, Richmond, and more). My mother has never done anything to jeopardize his job and has always worked very hard in the same job. She is a Human Resources Manager. SITUATION: My mother sent a few days ago a chain letter that received some employees. As everyone knows there chain forwards messages it receives to the people, not as a human resources manager, but as a person. Everybody has sent at least one string or email occasionally. Well, my mother realized I had not, but for some people it was offensive, received an email back from one of his friends saying it could be offensive so quickly sent an apology to all those who sent the e-mail to say she did not 't realize it was offensive and retracted it. Now 2 people have been saying it was offensive and are in the process of trying to shoot! They say it was racist and how much offended! My mother saved the email, but to me it just seems like another chain letter and I understand how my 63 year old mother did not think anything of it .. after all is just a chain letter. So for my mother who has given everything he can to make this company is the way the deal .. I know people are going to get fired and it is sad to think that people can be so cruel. In the midst of all this I know that finding a job in an economy that is in a terrible recession to support my family now, while traveling from Richmond to San Francisco every day. I'm sorry if this is long'm just very emotional ... its been difficult since the recession, we almost had to go broke a lot of times. My mom needs the money to pay for drugs and others do not know what we will do. Thanks for your time. Sorry for the length again. If you have more questions feel free to ask. Thank you.
Since my wife had a car accident (which will be fine , but can not move well with a broken leg ) my mother has been coming to